awkwaaaard

A few weeks ago a saleswoman came into my office to do a lunch and learn for a faucet company she represents.  She was touting the benefits of the faucets; their durability, their good looks, all the good applications in which to use them, and especially the water saving characteristics.  As she was making a good example of the water saving characteristics, she told the story about her fifteen year old son taking all those long showers.  "He'll take these twenty minute showers  and I'll ask him why he takes so long, and he'll just say for the first ten minutes he's just standing there.  And so with this little plastic limiter, we saved 120 bucks a year."  I wanted to be like, "come on lady....seriously?  you just discredited everything you just said with that statement.  He was just standing there?"

The Holidays

I was reading an article a few weeks ago in the paper about single people and holidays. The writer was a thirty-something woman who was lamenting about how hard it was to be single during the holidays and how relatives and family would inevitably question why she was single, or when she was going to bring someone home for the holidays and so on. I mean, I can see how that could be annoying. I've been in that same situation many times myself. Almost every Christmas of my life now that I think of it. But, I was never embarrassed or ashamed of myself. I'd just tell them I was looking.

To me, the far more awkward and uncomfortable thing is actually having a "sorta" girlfriend during the holidays. Like you've dated a couple months, but the verdict is still out on her. You kinda like her but not enough to get a million questions asked about your relationship during Christmas from the aunt and uncle you only see a few times a year. And you aren't sure if you want to subject her to your family's interrogation tactics, temper tantrums and holiday blow ups...or if you are like me, after a holiday dinner, you kinda just want to fall asleep somewhere and not socialize with the random family friends that someone invited in the final hour unbeknownst to you.

And that's just the half of it. It's all awkward between you and the girl. Do I go to her house? Do I ask her to come to my house? Do I have to tell my mom I am not going to be with our family this year because I am going to go to this girls house that she doesn't even know about that I only really started hanging out with two months ago? Do I really want to meet this girls family yet? Does she even want to meet my family? If we don't go to each others family's house and do our own thing, does she think that I don't like her?

I'd much rather deflect the "me being single" conversation, than have to deal with the "so this is your giiiiirrrllfrrrieeeenddd?"(cue the sarcastic voice) conversation all night long... and maybe even into the next holiday. "What happened to that girl you were dating last Christmas?...she was so cute?" "oh her, I don't know. She dumped me. And that was two years ago by the way."