bathroom thoughts

Why do people care so much about when/if/or how frequently someone takes a shit? Maybe it's not that they care about it but it seems to be something that everyone has an opinion about. For example: "Oh, you go every morning?" "You go twice a day?" "Some days you don't go?" "Oh, I go as soon as I wake up and right after my morning coffee." "I have a schedule." "I hate vacation, it throws off my whole schedule." "Let's not schedule that meeting for eight o'clock if you know what I mean." "You gotta go again? Jesus!" "Sometimes I go four times a day!"
But no one really seems to care either way about someone's pee schedule. People just pretty much go whenever they feel like it and no one gives them any shit about it.

Cabs

I got into a cab the other day for work and this was in the window. I thought it was pretty harsh. The cab driver was pretty cool, but I wanted to be like.."dude, lighten up. No hugging? Fuggkk." He left out some pretty disgusting things that apparently he deems permissible though. Interesting. I should have gone through a whole list of things that he could add. It could be called the Sit Still cab.

Never fails

I like to think that I have a pretty good and diverse music collection. I have cool friends, what can I say. But I'll hand someone my ipod and say "just play whatever... it's all my music, so I am going to like it." They'll inevitably pick something like Miley Cyrus Party in the USA. I don't really have a problem with that. I mean, I do kinda like that song. Admittedly it was a guilty pleasure of mine. It's not like I am listening to it every few days or anything. Or they'll be like "damn..... you have a lot of Madonna, wtf!?" I mean, it's not like she didn't have a hundred hits. I'm sorry but if you have the Immaculate Collection you automatically have 40 Madonna songs. Just never fails that I'll hand someone my ipod and they pick out the three songs I would like least like to listen to.

Life isn't so easy anymore

I had a friend over recently and I was just doing some last minute things around my house so I told her to make herself at home while I finished up whatever I was doing. I handed her the remote and she politely declined. Luckily, like everyone else she had a smartphone and could easily entertain herself. I realized then that she probably just didn't want to bother with the complicated nature of watching tv these days. I can't watch tv anywhere but my own house honestly. Someone hands me a Comcast remote, forget it. Maybe I know how to work one of their remotes but if it's the other remote that I'm not familiar with, no chance. Do I press "all on" or do I press "TV ON" then "cable on"? Power ON? Cable ON, then TV ON? Do I turn up the volume on the Comcast remote or on the stereo remote or the actual TV remote? You have Dish network? I don't even know what a Dish remote looks like. Fios? Do I press STB? If I press power is it going to F-up your whole set up? Do I change the channel on the Comcast remote or will that mess up everything? Oh you have one of those all inclusive 300 dollar radio remotes. You have the charge it? WTF? Can't we just have a TV that integrates the box into the tv and just have one remote that has six buttons? Power, channel up and down, volume up and down... and netflix. play/pause. fast forward/rewind. What am I forgetting?

ART SHOW...Thursday OCT. 27th

The Philadelphia chapter of the American Institute of Architects has chosen 5 of my drawings to include in their annual exhibition; Art by Architects which will run from Sunday October 23rd til November 19th at 1216 Arch Street. Next Thursday October 27th from 5-7pm is the opening night. Thirty eight architects will have their work displayed in the main gallery. Should be pretty awesome. Hope to see you there next Thursday!

Bachelor Parties

I went to a bachelor party this weekend and God are they exhausting! The best man rented a big 15 person cabin in the Poconos for a weekend of male bonding debauchery. Bachelor parties are more like "Lets' prove that we are MEN!" parties. Or "let's be neanderthals together!" So we spent a weekend of playing golf, smoking, drinking, shooting guns and eating terrible food around a campfire. And of course we went to a strip club. I am pretty sure that is every event to do to be considered a man. The only thing we didn't do was play football together or go fishing. After it was over, some of the guys were saying their goodbyes and said "ah man...too short, it was too short. I wish we had one more day." And I was thinking, God, I wish we had one less day. Don't get me wrong I had fun, I just can't handle all that for too long. I needed to get back in touch with my feminine side.
Speaking of feminine side- about the strip club... I hate going to strip clubs. I think the only time I went to a strip club under my own free will was the first time I ever went to a strip club. Never had a desire to go back to one after that. Strip clubs suck. Anyway, we went... and I gotta admit, sometimes they can be really funny. I am just thinking in my head, I hope one of these poor girls doesn't slide down that pole upside down and paralyze herself. That would just be tragic. And here I am giving this girl a dollar, and I'm being extra careful so that my bare hand doesn't touch her bare body accidentally, and my friends are putting dollar bills in their mouths so they can have their faces pressed up against their bare bodies. I kept thinking, there is no way I am going to risk my recently awarded clean bill of health by putting any kind of money in my mouth or near any stripper. Wasn't about to put my money where my mouth is...

Vomit

This is gross, but I am almost sure that when people get sick from drinking too much, if they had anything to eat beforehand there is a good possibility it was spaghetti. Almost 90% sure about that.