Sunday, October 14, 2012


I was at a restaurant recently and saw the required "employees must wash hands before returning to work"  affixed to the mirror.  To me, that's just weird.  Why doesn't it just say "employees must wash hands,, it's optional."

Indian Style

Apparently it's not cool to sit Indian Style anymore.  In schools they sit "criss-cross applesauce."  Which is fine.  I have said before that I wish they had a way to sit Italian style.  I'd sit that way all the time.  I don't see why anyone would be offended by naming a way to sit.  Unless it was all slouchy slob skank style.  But that wouldn't necessarily offend anyone but the person that was sitting that way.  It got me thinking about sitting Indian style.  Do you think Indians even liked sitting that way? It's not like it's a comfortable way to sit for any period of time.  Or do you think they were like "yo, Squannno...roll that log over here... I wanna get my lean back lounge on." 

Wednesday, October 10, 2012


A few weeks ago a saleswoman came into my office to do a lunch and learn for a faucet company she represents.  She was touting the benefits of the faucets; their durability, their good looks, all the good applications in which to use them, and especially the water saving characteristics.  As she was making a good example of the water saving characteristics, she told the story about her fifteen year old son taking all those long showers.  "He'll take these twenty minute showers  and I'll ask him why he takes so long, and he'll just say for the first ten minutes he's just standing there.  And so with this little plastic limiter, we saved 120 bucks a year."  I wanted to be like, "come on lady....seriously?  you just discredited everything you just said with that statement.  He was just standing there?"

Friday, October 5, 2012

Random thought about cows

My mind works in mysterious ways.  Don't ask me how I thought about this but... the other day I had a thought about cows... and how I bet the last 250 generations of cows have all been murdered.  So I made a small family tree.  Now just imagine this family tree multiplied by 200 times. It's messed up. Don't get too hung up on the accuracy of the family tree.  I realize it's very incestuous, whatever... I drew it in ten seconds not even looking at a cow for inspiration.  You get the idea.  It's a sad time for cows but they are oh so delicious.  Billions and Billions served.oh but that one survived... she became the head of laughing cow. The cow next to her was the spokesman for chik-fil-a.  murdered too