Banking

Online banking is a great convenience. What I find really funny is that you enter your password and your pin, and then sometimes they will ask you a security question afterward, just to make sure it's really you. TD Bank asks you questions that you've already submitted the answer; like "what was the make and model of your first car" or "what is your father's middle name" or "your childhood friend's last name." It doesn't concern me that my best friend could probably easily answer all the security questions without thinking for more than 2 seconds, it concerns me that whoever breaks into my house and gets into my account can simply type the correct first letter to each answer and the answer will automatically appear in autocomplete.

It Never Fails

How come it never fails that when you are getting dressed up to go somewhere and you put on your nice shirt, you go to brush your teeth and you inevitably drop some toothpaste slob on your nice shirt. And you know, no matter how much water you put on that spot, it's not going away. But how come if you wash your shirt, it will come out? Or you shave, and you are pretty sure you didn't shave over any pimples or rough spots on your neck and you are pretty confident there is no blood anywhere... but when you show up at the event, you look in the mirror and there are ten tiny blood spots all over your collar and undershirt. It never fails.

This guy at work

There's this guy at work, I swear I think he probably pulls his pants all the way down to pee.