Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Something that drives me crazy

I was talking with someone over a year ago about this. The whole foodie thing drives me crazy. Hate is a strong word but people that consider themselves "foodies" are annoying to me. Just because you eat at the fanciest restaurants or eat anything the local food critics say is good, doesn't make you a foodie. Actually maybe it does. Foodie is a dumb term. Foodie to me means someone who doesn't know jack about food and only eats out but has never actually cooked anything for themselves besides a microwave dinner because "they don't have time" to make anything else. I don't want to sound like a snob here, but most of this food everyone is raving about these days is old hat to me. My mom was making me asparagus and egg sandwiches when I was in elementary school. I wasn't trading my prosciutto/arugula/sharp provolone/roasted pepper sandwiches for gushers fruit snacks. Gourmet baby. But that isn't what this is about. What drives me more crazy is when people say the names of restaurants and pluralize/possessivize it. Like Bistro DiMarino. I went to Bistro DiMarino not I went to Bistro DiMarino's. Sapori isn't Sapori's. Verde isn't Verde's. I don't say I went to the Irish Pubses... Dumb foodies.

Thursday, March 24, 2011


It's not often that I can say that I have done something good fitness wise. I can joke about the gym all I want, but I just want to throw this out there that it's officially been over one year that I have consistently gone to the gym. Haven't missed more than two days in one week all year. Actually that's not true, one week I missed all week because I was on vacation...BUT I RAN THOSE DAYS! Anyway, I just want to gloat a little. I have run the Haddonfield Adrenaline 5k for the last three years in a row; Once as a large fatass, once as a medium fatass, and now once as a lighter fatass. Let me just say I have cut some serious time off my miles in the last three years. I'm effin proud of myself. Admittedly I was huffin the last mile this year but whatever, it was windy.. check out the results. Oh, and please note what place I finished. Yeah it doesn't sound good but just think how good everyone else had to be to beat me. Running 3.2 miles in under 20 minutes is ridiculous no matter how old you are.

Monday, March 14, 2011


Amateur architect, amateur artist... one of these days I will be a professional something. In the meantime, you should make a plan to come check out my art show at Yogawood in Collingswood (right at end of my street) as part of my town's Second Saturday festival on April 9th from 6pm-9pm. Every second Saturday of each month from the spring to the fall the shops and restaurants in Collingswood stay open a little later and have local artists and musicians display their work. It's pretty bumpin with people, and my shop is one of the best places to show work and it's right in the center of all of it. As an added bonus I'll supply some free wine at the show and maybe have a pre/post party at my house. Hope you all can make it!

Inquiring minds wanted to know.

I know a lot of you are on the edge of your seat with my bathroom renovation, so in order to placate the small handful of you, here's some snaps. This is about three weeks in, with really only about 2 days worth of work (not counting the demo). A lot of the time is spent staring at the wall, debating if what I am about to do is right, then looking at the book, then debating if what I am about to do is good enough, then debating whether I should have done that last piece better, or if I should remove the last piece altogether, then finally if I should just quit and call a professional. Here's what I have done; all the cement board is installed and ready for tile. Up next, greenboard the rest of the areas and get the floor underlayment down.

Things I have learned:
1. I should have done this before I moved in.
2. cement board is a pain in the ass.
3. I should have only tiled the shower area instead of all 4 walls.
4. new plumbing is a bigger pain in the ass than I want to deal with.
5. It's hard doing these things with no money and no help.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Things that are weird.

It's weird to me when a young person tragically dies for no apparent reason. It's not necessarily weird, but it's terrible. Like recently, that high school kid who hit the game winning shot in his state tournament game, and then died shortly thereafter. I never understand why they die. Inevitably, later, the coroner will say, "He had an enlarged heart." To me, that's pretty an odd way to die. How does this come to be? I think it goes like this. The coroner cuts the kid open and is like, "A-ha! There's the cause Watson! Look at his heart. It's way too big! No wonder why he died. No teenager can live with a heart that's sorta bigger than normal." Weird right? Also, is it weird that when I think of a teenager dying, I kinda wonder if they at least got some before they died?

Monday, March 7, 2011

Check me out. Album droppin' in stores March 15th!

Alright, alright, this has nothing to do with joining a gay gym, but check out this sweetass graphic tee I bought after going to a job site in Northeast Philly. I convinced my buddy at work to buy one too. Don't worry I might only wear it out in public maybe one more time... When the album drops. Oh, and we doctored up the background a bit for added impact. Enjoy!

New Years Resolutions

Last year I made a list of about 30 or 40 things I wanted to accomplish in the new year. I may have been a little too ambitious, but I ended up accomplishing maybe half of the things I said I was going to do. (believe me, the list was way too ambitious. Half sounds bad but it wasn't as bad as it sounds) This year I revised my list with some new things, and some of the same old things that I didn't accomplish last year. It's still ambitious but much more reasonable, and I am determined to do them all. I think everyone should try it. It works when you write them down and have to look at them everyday. Last weekend I saw two musicals! In one weekend! Doesn't sound that exciting to most of you, I know, but I wanted to see at least two musicals this year and I accomplished it in the same weekend. That part is kind of disappointing, but I can still see more later in the year. I know what you guys are thinking too, "mike joined a gay gym, and now he's going to musicals? WTF?!" All I can say is, that I am very secure with myself. Anyway, I also went to a pretty sweet singing competition last Wednesday. One of our clients is the Ogontz Avenue Revitalization Corp. and they are holding an american idol style competition for their jazz fest in June. Took this sweetass picture there.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

More Math Methods

I guess similar to my last post, you could say that the humans and dancers comment is sort of like one of those If/Then statements. If we are humans then we must be dancers... which would be false. It would be; If they are dancers, then they must be humans... which I also sort of proved false with my dog story. Anyway, that isn't really the point. What I want to know is, how come nobody accepts the "guess and check" method as a legitimate means of figuring something out once you reach 15 years old? I guess scientists formulate some idea of what an outcome will be when they are conducting experiments and then check if they are right, but it's not really like a random guess. It would be funny if my boss asked me how I came up with the multiplier for leasable vs. usable square footage and I just say, well I used guess and check. It'd be cool if I said that and actually knew how I came up with the answer and was just messing with him, but I am pretty sure it wouldn't have the desired humorous affect. While we are on the topic of mathematic means, how come people are always asking for the average...but they never really ask for the mean? Yeah, I know that's the same thing as the average. And you never here them ask for the mode... you hear median sometimes but never mean or mode. Maybe it's just not in my line of work. Next time someone asks you how many people were at the bar, just say, "well I'd say the mean was about 65 tops." I guess that might be better suited for a guess and check though.

Things that make you go hmm.

Are we human or are we dancers? One of the worst lines in any song, ever... I think we are humans, and we can be dancers if we want to or we've had enough to drink. Pretty sure they aren't exclusive. But Mike, you have to be a human if you are a dancer. Not true. One time during the holidays when my dog was a puppy, she bunched up her dog bed and began humping it. It was a little awkward since everyone in the family was kinda hanging around her at the time. We all kinda were sheepishly laughing, knowing full well what was happening. My grandmom says through her tears of laughter, "look at baci, she's dancing!" And now anytime I see a dog humping anything, I say it's dancing.
And the other line that I pretty much hate, that deplorable Kings of Leon song...Ugh, say what you will about them, but that "sex is on fire" song, as catchy as it may be is terrible. If your sex is on fire, you are either doing it wrong or it's herpes... Or so I have heard..